FRESH PEPPER - Tuesday May 25, 2010

today’s Musing  written and published from Cranston in south- east  Calgary, near the Bow River valley

 

Morning walk: 4C/39F, calm, a few clouds; Gusta found bird activity on the lagoon deserved investigation – legs/underbelly returned soggy – dog smiling, ducks and geese paddled along to destinations, as if nothing was happening.  Dogs exploring, ducks paddling – we should all take summer time to learn their calm, in garden or park or beside a constructed wetland storm water catch-basin.  Pond would seems a better term, lagoon even better - conjures thoughts of an evening walk in paradise, yearning to do things I’ve never done, imaginings, how things might be, dotted line between fantasy and reality - but I believe this goes beyond any line, dotted or otherwise, that might separate longing for the second half of life or regretting the first half.

 

‘poof’

 

Reality check; Tuesday morning, Calgary, work to do, time flew. But first, join me – to question whether the last few days made us better, if our experiences made us stronger or better prepared for what comes next?

 

I didn’t control it. Someone else did; ideas, agenda – not mine at all.  I was reminded - as someone took umbrage with my entire life without knowing much about it – that my view of the world is not going to match up with anyone whose brain works that differently from mine.  This weekend exploration was peculiar, unsettling but not unnerving. I won’t give up my driven quest. But, when experiences like that seem to waste precious time, sap valuable energy – there is a bonus, silver lining in that cloud – the time and angst of a future that WON’T be realized, because I realized someone is not right for me . . . so, passing, moving along, is fine . . .

 

Harnessing energy and creativity is my job. Managing frenetic pace, balancing slow and sublime too – that’s my job. I’ll not delegate it or have someone impose their version of life on mine . . .

 

Awash in a sea: questions, answers, views and interpretations, I am reminded of randomness magic. Best laid plans are, believe me, not best, or laid, at all.  Out of that nothingness, voice comes, from far away, glimmer of magic, taste of understanding . . . a little seasoning, some fresh pepper.

 

P.S.  …. I launched a new website (to host my weekly newsletter…re-started after a 15 month break); I’m pleased with it and invite your visit/comments on FACILITYCalgary

~~~

SLEEP AHEAD - archived poetry

 

I went to bed,

I was ahead

in life and

not far behind

my goals

but I woke up

one world-turn

behind again,

so I have to

work all day

to catch up

with you,

wondering

all day

where it is

that night went

again, and

questing to

know where

this day

will lead

and whether

next time

I wake

I’ll feel

behind

again

or ahead

for the

first time.

~~~

 

Mark Kolke

322,256

 

RESPONSES/COMMENTS ALWAYS WELCOME; send to: dailycolumn@markkolke.com

 

May 24 Comments

 

May 24 – BUT NOT ENOUGH – Maybe we are not supposed to understand each other and just understand that we are wired different and that's it.  I think if you can tolerate one another for a long period of time that's probably good enough.  I have lived with many people in my lifetime, college roommates, husbands, live in lovers and children.  I can't say that I was happy with any of them every day or even weeks at a time, but I learned to deal with it or move on. And as far as the quotes, they all make sense depending on the day or the mood.  Why is it that we all have to analyze and dissect everything and everyone, it's so exhausting. Mark, I like you just the way you are, but of course I am over here and you are over there.  Easy isn't it. LOL,  MM, Arlington Heights, IL

 

May 24 – BUT NOT ENOUGH - Mark, please let CH from Red Deer know that I really appreciate the encouraging comments. Indeed, my life is exponentially better this year and when I finally meet my last great love, I will offer him the gift I've unwrapped and first given to myself...a vibrant, confidant woman, who doesn't 'need' him to be whole, but fully celebrates his company on the rest of our fabulous journey, SW, Coeur d'Alene, ID

 

May 24 – BUT NOT ENOUGH - Happy holiday.  Ours is next Monday.  In response to your Carl Jung quote, if you look at your hand when you point to someone, notice that you are pointing three fingers back at yourself.  I regularly do this and am amazed.  What I dislike in others is what I dislike in myself.  I used to be quick to judge others, but not so much today.  When I find I do, or start telling someone else what to do in a situation, I pause and ask myself, "is this something that is also applies to me?"   This shift in perspective allows me to be compassionate about the other person and to remind myself that maybe this is an area I need to focus on and maybe do something about myself!, JK, Kailua, HI

 

May 24 – BUT NOT ENOUGH - In the beginning.....men hunted and procreated, and they still do.  These days hunting could be, among other things but not limited to, for interesting thoughts, new projects, clients to sell to, new places to eat, a better place to live, a woman with which to procreate.  They focus on one thing at a time, that’s why we have so many great men in history.  Women, on the other hand, and I know you are probably sighing as you read this, had many things to occupy them, many things to be aware of at once.  They minded the children they bore until they were independent and in minding them they protected them, soothed their minor wounds, cooked (or tore the meat off what the men brought home), dried meat, taught the children their independence, made clothing from the skins they took from the animals the men hunted, they sought firewood, swept debris from the shelter they helped build.  They are well suited to multitasking, therefore focussing on many things at once without neglecting any.  That’s why we have so many great women in history.  Have you stopped sighing yet?  The women provided warmth, a safe haven in a storm, conversation, children, warm cooked food and that’s why you men keep hunting for them – they provide the home, the men provide the house.  Some men and some women cannot feel complete without that special someone in their lives.  A relationship is not shared half by a man and half by a woman, a relationship is created as a third entity when two complete and whole individuals contribute energy to it.  It takes on life – but until you know who you really are and until you are comfortable being a whole one, not a half of a relationship, what you get is what you’ve always got.  Once again, learn about your oneness, take the time to be really alone and comfortable with it and if the universe sees that you really are, then you will be ready to meet the one who is also ready.  On the other hand, if you want what you’ve always had, then keep doing what you’ve always done.  I think you’re too smart for that.  JW-Cochrane/Calgary, AB  soon to be Montreal then New York....another adventure begins tomorrow.